Too Excited To Sleep

Yeah.. We Leave Tomorrow:)

First stop the Excalibur in Vegas

Then on to The Happiest Place on Earth.

Yay!!!

Melt Down

Not sure why I chose this picture

Of all the pictures of us.

I just love how happy Ken looks here.

It was just a day.

A Saturday.

He came up to Payson to see me at work.

And Santa Thane was there.

So we got our picture taken.

Just a day.

And I think I realize now that this is what I love the most

About Ken.

Just the days.

The days when he just hangs out with me

Because I'm me

And there's noone he'd rather be with.

I had a meltdown this morning.

I miss my kids.

They love their Dad's girlfriend.

That's hard for me.

I'M their Mom, dammit!!!!

I try to understand.

And in my head,

I DO understand.

But in my heart....

ah, my heart.

Ken fixes it.

Holds me when I cry.

Tells me I'm a good Mom.

That they love me.

And time will help.

I'd be lost without him.

Please, God, never let me forget

How blessed I am

To have found this amazing man.

Never let me take him for granted.

Strength

My beautiful little daughter is having a miscarriage.

My heart is breaking.

It's been a few days now.

They didn't do a D&C

So she's just going through it.

Labor pains, cramping, bleeding

With no reward of a baby at the end.

And she has SUCH a good attitude.

I can't believe how strong she is.

Wow.

I am humbled by what great people my children are.

In spite of the hell their parents have put them through.

I am so blessed.

More than I deserve.

Big Changes....

Big Changes at Casa Carlson....

I retired my Blackberry and went back to my trusty old LG phone.

I love this phone.

It's easy to navigate and simple to use.

And it only costs $10 a month.

No big fancy data package.

I get free internet at home~

A perk of living with the cable guy.

So why do I need a data package on my phone? Hmmm..

I am smarter than my smart phone.

Yay me!

And.... when I started using the old phone today

I found all my old texts that I saved from when Ken and I first met

And started dating.

Awe...

Nice to have those back again.

Second big change...

I gave my notice today at Wal-Mart.

Really tough decision.

It's been a great job.

But it's a two-hour commute for me.

For very little money.

I loved it.

I loved seeing Zack every day.

But it was costing more in gas money than it was worth.

And I was gone from home 12 hours a day.

So I'll be working full time at Maverik here in Ephraim.

A couple blocks from home.

Yay!

Still making very little money.

But no commute.

And it's a lot of fun.

Seeing the college kids.

Catching the scoop on the outrageous number of crimes

Occuring in our little county lately.

Wow.

I love working there:)

And the new semester starts Monday.

I procrastinated my math classes.

So I still have two more semesters to my

Associates Degree

and then on to my Bachelors

I love school.

Life is good:)