~ Aunt Joey~

My Aunt JoAnne passed away this morning. I'm still in shock. All day I've been thinking it just can't be true. There are so many conversations that we never had. Things I thought we would sit down and say one day. And now "one day" will never come. Every single memory from my childhood has Joey and her kids in it. We were inseparable. We did everything together from Sunday dinners to Christmas Eve to summer vacations. When I was a little girl, I thought she was elegant. She dressed well, smelled good and knew just how to do Melissa's beautiful hair. When I was a teenager, I borrowed her clothes and her shoes, and when I broke the heel of her favorite black pumps, I thought she was going to kill me. She never did find a pair she liked as well as those. That's one of the conversations we never had. Joey, I'm sorry. For so many things. Thank you. For so many things. I love you. I'm sorry I haven't told you that for many, many years. I always thought I would tell you one day. During one of those conversations we were going to have. One day. Thank you for bringing my cousins into this world and for loving their children the way I know my Mom would have loved mine. Thank you for calling my baby sister last week and for taking her a gift when Lincoln was born. Thank you for making an effort to stay in touch with us even when we were all so busy and wrapped up in our lives that we didn't spend as much time with you as we should have. Thank you for buying us dresses and black patent shoes when we were little. You knew it was important. Thank you. Thank you for sitting us down at Sizzler and telling us we were too young to get married. We got married anyway. But thank you for worrying, for caring. Thank you for taking care of my sister-in-law when she was still with us. You weren't related to Teri, but you treated her like one of the family. Thank you.

And here is Joey with my Grandma at the birthday bash Joey planned to celebrate Grandma's 80th year on this earth. Grandma had lost her 2nd child 10 months prior to the party. And now she's lost her 3rd child. Along with 8 of her 9 brothers and sisters. Her parents. Her husband. Her 17 year old granddaughter. My heart absolutely breaks over and over again today for my dear Grandma. I will never understand why the hardest things happen to the strongest people. It doesn't seem fair that my Grandma has said goodbye to so many loved ones. She amazes me. When I called her this morning, we were both sobbing so hard we couldn't even understand what we were trying to say to each other. She's been through so much. And loved Joey so much. If anyone hurt JoAnne, they were NEVER forgiven by her Mama.

Joey, Grandma and some of the grandkids... There are so many wrapped in this hug, I can't tell who all is there...

Joey was always good to my Dad after Mom died. Her she is with my Dad and my cute little Granny, my Dad's Mom. We lost Granny last year on Thanksgiving Day. I hate November.

My Mom died on November 24, 1987. And now she has her little sister there with her. I'm actually a little bit jealous that Joey gets to see her again.


Because this man loved them enough to give them an eternal family. My Mom was 8 and Joey was 6 when Grandma met Larry Swenson. My biological grandfather, Ray Freston, and Grandma Becca divorced at a time when it was rare and very difficult for single women. But Grandpa came along and raised Becky and Joey as his own. When Ray passed away in 1977, Grandpa took a very pregnant Becky and a very pregnant JoAnne to the judge's chambers and adopted them, even though they were both grown up and married with families of their own. It was just a formality. They were his girls all along. And now he has them both, back with him where they always belonged. Grandpa left this earth on September 14, 1998, at 86 years of age.

Along with the boy they called their baby brother even though he was 6 1/2 feet tall. Marv died of leukemia on October 2, 2005. He didn't talk about his feelings much at all, but at Grandpa's funeral, he said something along the lines that his Dad was probably sitting on a porch swing with Becky. I like to think there are a few of them on that swing now.

And the only thing that has made me smile at all today is the thought of the reunion JoAnne had with her baby girl, Anna. Marianna died in a car accident when she was 17 years old~on April 19, 1999~and Joey was never the same. She talked about Anna all the time, and visited her grave often. And now the two of them will flit off to California to check on Maksi and the Sinkliers, walk along the beach and listen to Bono. For Joey, I am happy. I am certain she was welcomed by a crowd of people who have been waiting a long time to see her. For Zeke, John and all of the others who loved her so very much, I am sad. Thank you for what you brought to my life, Joey. I'll tell you. One day.