Happy Night:)

Ashli planned a fun Family Night for me and the boys tonight. The theme was all about "Happiness"

We had pizza with pepperoni which started out in a smiley-face shape, but we ended up covering the whole crust with pepperoni anyway. Kool-Aid Jammers, just for the smile... And sugar cookies with smiley-faces made from Runts bananas and hearts...

She gave a lesson about making happy moments one at a time

And had us all make a "happy list" of things that make us happy, from the smallest thing to the biggest dream vacation

She made a book for us to put our lists in

And we all decorated our page with our names

Our lists are in the book where we can all read them

And if one of us is having a bad day, the rest of us can look at his/her list and find something we can do to bring a happy moment to the day. It was a great evening. I continue to be amazed at the maturity and depth of character my kids have. I am SO blessed that God trusted me to be their Mom.

Ugh...

Minor setback yesterday.

Back on the horse I guess.

Filed the papers.

It sucked.

Hurting.

A lot.

People~

So many good people in this world. And most of them end up in a Wal-Mart checkout line at one time or another.

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The Dad with lots of children. Black children. White children. All ages. All calling him "Dad" even though he's old enough to be called "Grandpa".

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The marathon runner and his Eagle Scout son. Already felt a connection to his wife the first time I met her last week. Don't know their names. Love them anyway.

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The girls who snuck up behind me. Just to say hi and see how I'm doing.

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The returned missionary whose claim to fame is attending an Amish buffet in Intercourse, Pennsylvania. (Intercourse is adjacent to Paradise, btw)

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Tyler's friends. Love them. All so different from each other. Good kids.

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The Dad who dug four dollars' worth of quarters out of his pocket to buy a package of socks for his little girl. When he left the house, she was in her bedroom crying and trying to sew up a hole in her socks so she'd have some to wear to school.

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The woman who walked over and swiped her own credit card when her neighbor's card was declined.

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The guy from Switzerland.

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The girl from Paris.

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I am truly blessed to have the opportunity to meet amazing people every single day. They all make me want to be a better person.

The Master's Hand

I'm super tired, but I had to blog about my awesome day before I go to sleep.

I had to critique some fine art for one of my college classes, so I went to the

Carl Bloch exhibit "The Master's Hand" at BYU this morning.

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No, wait, first I went clear to Lindon to get a new windshield. We got a rock chip in 2007 and never fixed it, so it finally turned into a spidery web of cracks. But I guess that's beside the point.

The exhibit of Carl Bloch's work was breathtaking. Many of his works are altar pieces, designed to be the focal point at the front of Christian chapels in Denmark and Sweden. And they are massive. Huge oil paintings on canvas and absolutely unbelievable. "The Doubting Thomas" is the first piece you see when you walk into the exhibit. The room was completely silent, and there was a sense of reverence throughout the exhibit hall as I walked through each room.

I can't really articulate how this painting " Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane" made me feel, but I couldn't stop crying when I saw it. I feel like God has kind of asked me to go through a lot lately. But nothing like what Jesus Christ went through. And He has sent me angels the same way He sent them to Jesus in Gethsemane. Jesus was vulnerable, in need of comfort, just like I am sometimes. But what He had to go through was so much more difficult than anything I have to face. This painting touched me in a way that I just can't explain adequately.

I was all alone at the exhibit and spent about two hours looking at Bloch's paintings and the poignant photography of Dorothea Lange. It was just the kind of day I love. Nobody rushing me to move on to something more exciting. I was so glad I went by myself and took the time to enjoy it all.

I had quiche for the first time ever, and I took like 45 minutes to enjoy my nice, peaceful lunch.

They asked me to stay an extra hour at work tonight, and this woman came to my checkout line. Amy the Savvy Shopper brought every ad from every newspaper in the state, coupons to match her price-matched ads, and double coupons from K-Mart. She knows what she is doing. It took me an hour, but she got a cart full of groceries, name-brand groceries, not Great Value, for $18.00. Amazing. Guess I'll be going to one of her classes in the near future.

All in all, a great day. It was great to realize that I like hanging out with me. We had a great time: me, myself and I, and I think we can get used to this. Life is pretty good, I'd say:)

GREATEST.KIDS.EVER

So I was even more of an emotional wreck on Valentines Day than I thought I would be.

Kneeling down by my bed, crying, praying, feeling sorry for myself that morning...

right at THAT moment, Zack and Tyler showed up, each of them carrying roses for their Mama. The timing couldn't have been better.

At work that evening, Zack showed up, bearing a gorgeous flower arrangement from Ashli and Mack. So the day was OK. Tawni and my Dad sent me texts, a couple of my friends checked in on me, and I survived the lovers' holiday. And now I'm in the home stretch. No more emotional holidays in the near future. Yay!!!!

I Love You Because......

So this is sure to be an interesting Valentine's Day for me. My first one as a single girl since I was about 16 years old. So instead of sitting around feeling sorry for myself, I decided to focus on some of the people who I really love and have made this past year awesome for me in so many ways.

I LOVE YOU BECAUSE.....

Ashli ~ You've put your own hurts, worries and fears on the back burner to be there for me. You're my friend, my daughter, my therapist, and we have lots of fun days ahead!
Zack~You make me laugh. We like the same things. You have great goals and plans for your future. You're a good man.
Tyler~You said "no" to your friends probably more than times than I even know about, so I wouldn't be sitting home alone. Thank you, Ty!
Tami~ We can go days or weeks without talking, and the minute I need something, I know I can call you and you'll drop everything to listen to me, call one of the kids to come over and make sure I'm OK, take me to a gymnastics meet, come see me. The list goes on and on....
Tara~I know you'll tell me the truth when I call. I need that. Thank you!
Tawni~You have this patient, gentle soul. Anyone who can take care of kids and puppies the way you do has a special place in heaven!
Paul~ You introduced me to my ancestors and gave me a whole new appreciation of who I am and where I came from.
Hig~ You let me take a picture at Aunt Joey's wake without flipping me the bird.
Ted~You sent me a message one day last Fall that meant more to me than anything you've ever said to me before. I printed it and I'm keeping it FOREVER!
Dad~ You get mad at the people who hurt me, just as I think Mom would do. You give me beautiful gifts from the heart, and never forget a birthday or holiday, complete with a rubber stamped card.
Joey~You gave my baby brother a beautiful family and shower me with love and support.
Jeanie~You send me beautiful flowers, beautiful cards, Emails, messages, and I can feel of your love even when I go years without seeing you.
Bob~Well... you gave me $60 to help pay my rent the FIRST time I went to college, you give me encouragement and a positive outlook on life the SECOND time I'm in college.
Brett, Andrea and Elton~You never gave up on me. You climbed the wall I built around myself in the past two years of absolute hell that I've lived through and I knew through it all that you guys were there for me. You were persistent and loving, and continue to reach out to me all the time. Thank you!
Dianna, Steph, Alesha and Dixie~Well. This is the one that's making me cry. I love you because you're still my family. Thank you. I was so afraid I'd lose all of you, and so glad that I didn't. I love you all.
Franki, Urs and Amy~For the fun we're going to have in the future! Thanks for offering love and support, through Ashli, facebook or texts.
Brian~You check on me nearly every day, even though I put up a wall sometimes.
The Justins, the Steves, Richard~ The late night chats when I can't sleep have kept me sane and made me laugh over and over again. Saved my life. Truly. Love you guys.
Michelle and Annie~ Thank you for coming to see me, in spite of the pillows on the floor and my goofy pajamas. Thank you for checking on me and making me smile!
Lisa K~YOU.ARE.AWESOME! The care package, the love, the messages, the card, it goes on and on. So grateful that I continue to learn lessons from a liberal:)
Jeremy and Sindy~ You pop by and check in and it means a lot to me. Thank you!!
Kathy, Trisha and Rachelle~You've welcomed me with open arms into a club I never wanted to join. You get it. You're awesome. Thank you!
Linda L~You've given me back my confidence and my hope that I can do it. Reminded me that I really do have something to give the world.
Lisa Jane~ You let me walk on the dance floor in street shoes 16 years ago when I didn't know any better. You love my babies as if they're your own. You see the good in everyone.
Meggan~You thought of me when you needed someone for a very special project, and it meant the world to me. I cherish you.
Michelle, Natalie, Pat, Valerie, Robert~You send me hearts and hugs:)
Missy & Mikkell~ I've known you longer than anyone else in Nephi, and I love you more all the time. Thanks for your friendship through job changes, baptisms, weddings and divorces, babies and dogs. Love you!
Yolanda~It was so important to me that I get to know you, and you are an even more amazing person than I imagined you would be. Thank you for the inspiring things you say on facebook and the sweet comments you make on my blog and my facebook. I'm SO glad I've gotten to know you the past few months.
Tristen, Elizabeth, Melissa~ You are my favorite cousin. You know which one you are. Yes, it's true. I can't choose. I love you all so much. Thank you for coming back into my life the past few years. I adore you all.
Krista, Jacquie, Liz, Jennie, Marcy, Krystine~You are beautiful bloggers and you inspire me to be a better Mom and a better person.

Improvise and Overcome

SO.... I needed a couple things from Family Dollar this morning..

Some soap...

Arm & Hammer carpet foam.. the kind that you spray on the carpet after you vacuum. Smells good. I got Island Mist.

Sue was working at Family Dollar today. She started a conversation at checkout, just like we in retail are trained to do:) Asked me how my morning was going so far. And I said

"Great. Not looking forward to the snow this afternoon, though."

A benign conversation about the weather. And Sue said "Well, it will come anyway. So Improvise and Overcome, Dear."

OK Wow.... Pretty sure she didn't mean for me to take that phrase so deeply into my soul this morning.

"Improvise and Overcome".

Probably something her Grandma used to tell her Mom, then her Mom told her, and she tells the ladies that shop at Family Dollar. Don't we Improvise and Overcome EVERY SINGLE day? My favorite socks are dirty. So I wear a different pair. Bummer. But life goes on.

And then there are the big things!

Tomorrow is Zack's birthday.

When he was born, he went right to Primary Children's Medical Center.

And every day was an exercise in "Improvise and Overcome".

Didn't want to face another discouraging day up there at the hospital. But we did. Every day. With the help of the hospitality cart, some basketball cards from the gift shop, the "pumping" room with the other Moms. And we were grateful every day that our little one lived through the night, when there was usually a new empty bed atleast a couple times a week there in the Newborn ICU.

So, thanks Sue, for your words of wisdom this morning. Happy Monday:)